HD weapon for my wife
- Drewsifer
- Sharp Shooter

- Posts: 122
- Joined: Wed, 15 Sep 2010 21:00:08
- Location: Harrisonburg, Virginia
HD weapon for my wife
I'm looking for a good home defense weapon for my wife. 6 months ago she had NEVER even held a gun. And she's been fantastic about learning things, and wants her own gun. There are some limitations. My wife has very small hands, so something like a Glock is out. I think she could fire it alright, but I don't know how well she could work the controls.
Here are somethings I'm thinking of.
Charter Arms 2" .38 Special.
Yeah its a snubbie, but my wife loved the grip, it came in her favorite color (pink), and .38 is a pretty forgiving round. A longer barrel would be nice though.
Slim 9mm
There's a couple out there. Bersa, Kahr, Walther, etc. Pistols that are slim enough for her to use but sharing ammo makes me happy.
Ruger LCP/LC9 or S&W Bodyguard
Small, slim, and in .380 or 9mm. Seems perfect for her, right?
And here's the odd ball. Kel-tec Sub-2000
Yeah, the grip is the same as Glocks. But she has a foregrip and can shoulder the weapon, which would really help her with stability. We could share magazines and ammo.
Shotguns are out for right now until she gets some more experience. Wanted to see you guys thought.
Here are somethings I'm thinking of.
Charter Arms 2" .38 Special.
Yeah its a snubbie, but my wife loved the grip, it came in her favorite color (pink), and .38 is a pretty forgiving round. A longer barrel would be nice though.
Slim 9mm
There's a couple out there. Bersa, Kahr, Walther, etc. Pistols that are slim enough for her to use but sharing ammo makes me happy.
Ruger LCP/LC9 or S&W Bodyguard
Small, slim, and in .380 or 9mm. Seems perfect for her, right?
And here's the odd ball. Kel-tec Sub-2000
Yeah, the grip is the same as Glocks. But she has a foregrip and can shoulder the weapon, which would really help her with stability. We could share magazines and ammo.
Shotguns are out for right now until she gets some more experience. Wanted to see you guys thought.
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Personally, I'd never recommend Charter anything for anyone I didn't hate.
Unless she's got some reason to stick to a handgun, a carbine of some kind will be a lot easier to handle in a stressful situation than a handgun - while being more accurate and more powerful (sometimes a lot more powerful). I like the M1 carbine (and so does my mom), but there's a certain level of committment needed for that platform. Lots of other pistol caliber carbines can work. Semiauto or even lever action.
Unless she's got some reason to stick to a handgun, a carbine of some kind will be a lot easier to handle in a stressful situation than a handgun - while being more accurate and more powerful (sometimes a lot more powerful). I like the M1 carbine (and so does my mom), but there's a certain level of committment needed for that platform. Lots of other pistol caliber carbines can work. Semiauto or even lever action.
- zephyp
- VGOF Platinum Supporter

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Re: HD weapon for my wife
If she likes the .38 revolvers consider a .357. She can shoot .38s and build up as skills are gained. You can have fun with it too!
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- gunderwood
- VGOF Platinum Supporter

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Re: HD weapon for my wife
+1Diomed wrote:Personally, I'd never recommend Charter anything for anyone I didn't hate.
Unless she's got some reason to stick to a handgun, a carbine of some kind will be a lot easier to handle in a stressful situation than a handgun - while being more accurate and more powerful (sometimes a lot more powerful). I like the M1 carbine (and so does my mom), but there's a certain level of committment needed for that platform. Lots of other pistol caliber carbines can work. Semiauto or even lever action.
A good shotgun or carbine are always better than a handgun all else being equal. However, if she doesn't want to practice with it or the recoil is too much, etc. then less is more. I personally keep both around. The handgun(s) are around, but if I have time to grab a 12ga or carbine I'll take that. However, for my wife (who is also small) the Mossberg 590 is a bit too big. She can use it, but it isn't ideal. Shorten it up a bit and she would do fine.
The obvious downside is that in very tight spaces they are harder to maneuver and a pistol can be carried around the house all the time if she wishes.
Unless you reload or aren't particularly cost sensitive, 9mm is the way to go for a first handgun IMHO. Even basic .38Sp is more expensive than WWB 9mm at Walmart or similar. Practice is the most important thing.
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- ShadowByte
- Marksman

- Posts: 85
- Joined: Mon, 01 Mar 2010 20:13:04
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Is there a range near you where you can rent and shoot? It'd be nice for her to try out a few things and find something she feels comfortable handling. Then she'll be more apt to want to practice with it too. If it is going to be just for home defense and not CC, then the size factor won't be so much an issue and she'll have a range of options.
I second the 9mm on cost, it is very affordable to shoot and you'll be more likely to want to shoot more and more often.
Or you could go for a shotgun with the 18.5" barrel. I wouldn't get the ones with the extensions since they add weight, and if you haven't hit anything within the first few shots, I am sure the people won't be in the house for long after that first round goes off. Again though, getting practice and familiarity with it is important.
I second the 9mm on cost, it is very affordable to shoot and you'll be more likely to want to shoot more and more often.
Or you could go for a shotgun with the 18.5" barrel. I wouldn't get the ones with the extensions since they add weight, and if you haven't hit anything within the first few shots, I am sure the people won't be in the house for long after that first round goes off. Again though, getting practice and familiarity with it is important.
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Personally, my experience tells me to stick with revovler. My wife shoots and loves my s&w 38 spec. It's weight is negligable, is very easy aim (even in a point and shoot situation which most home defenses are going to be) and the cost of shooting it at the range will be light. The shotgun ideas are good for men who've been trained on them, I reckon a woman could use it as well. The length of pull, the length of the shotgun, the recoil, the sound and the time it takes to shoulder sight and squeeze would be my main concern in recommending it to anyone who has not had a lot of time working one. You can't go wrong with a revolver for home defense. She wont have to rack the gun, nor will she have to grab a shotgun and weild it. This is my personal experience, and advice. If your wife likes the color, that's cool too. The key is SHE MUST BE COMFORTABLE WITH, AND SHOOT WHAT SHE PLANS ON USING AS A DEFENSE WEAPON!
IMHO hope this helps.
IMHO hope this helps.
- gunderwood
- VGOF Platinum Supporter

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Re: HD weapon for my wife
Good points. A revolver probably requires the least amount of skill to use for the first cylinder of shots. Especially if it is a simple DAO revolver. If you need more shots (or arguably more speed), then semis easily win over revolvers. If you need more power, than carbines/shotguns easily win over handguns. However, to handle the failure modes of a semi requires more training than a revolver and to handle a carbine/shotgun effectively requires a bit more.davasmith wrote:Personally, my experience tells me to stick with revovler. My wife shoots and loves my s&w 38 spec. It's weight is negligable, is very easy aim (even in a point and shoot situation which most home defenses are going to be) and the cost of shooting it at the range will be light. The shotgun ideas are good for men who've been trained on them, I reckon a woman could use it as well. The length of pull, the length of the shotgun, the recoil, the sound and the time it takes to shoulder sight and squeeze would be my main concern in recommending it to anyone who has not had a lot of time working one. You can't go wrong with a revolver for home defense. She wont have to rack the gun, nor will she have to grab a shotgun and weild it. This is my personal experience, and advice. If your wife likes the color, that's cool too. The key is SHE MUST BE COMFORTABLE WITH, AND SHOOT WHAT SHE PLANS ON USING AS A DEFENSE WEAPON!
IMHO hope this helps.
A revolver is a good choice, but IMHO with more training you can do better (now I've done it!).
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- Drewsifer
- Sharp Shooter

- Posts: 122
- Joined: Wed, 15 Sep 2010 21:00:08
- Location: Harrisonburg, Virginia
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Absolutely she has to be comfortable with her gun. Once we get her weapon we're going to go shooting together at least once a month, preferably more if the bills to money left over ratio works out.
It doesn't HAVE to be a pistol, but right now that's what she's most familiar with. Before I branch out into a new weapon system I would want her to try it first. I wouldn't be against her using a 20ga shotgun, but I'm worried that it's bit of a leap physcologically from pistols and .22's to a shotgun of any kind. But I'll brooch the subject.
Once I pick up the G19 we'll go see how she does with it. Then I guess we'll go from there.
It doesn't HAVE to be a pistol, but right now that's what she's most familiar with. Before I branch out into a new weapon system I would want her to try it first. I wouldn't be against her using a 20ga shotgun, but I'm worried that it's bit of a leap physcologically from pistols and .22's to a shotgun of any kind. But I'll brooch the subject.
Once I pick up the G19 we'll go see how she does with it. Then I guess we'll go from there.
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Why the focus on shotguns? They're not some kind of magic death ray like Hollywood portrays. Effective use requires just as much practice as any other firearm, plus a healthy tolerance for recoil if you're using effective loads (buckshot and slugs in 12 or 20ga). Diminished magazine capacity is also a reality. Anything smaller/weaker, like the .410 or birdshot and it's just rolling the dice too much - stick with a carbine.Drewsifer wrote:I wouldn't be against her using a 20ga shotgun, but I'm worried that it's bit of a leap physcologically from pistols and .22's to a shotgun of any kind. But I'll brooch the subject.
Re: HD weapon for my wife
I'm with you on a revolver as HD for women (or neophyte shooter with small hands). Me and my wife is a smallish woman. Her hands are strong but too small to comfortably span a full framed handgun. She handled smaller framed .38s and a lot of them are so lightweight that they would recoil big time. The revolver she liked best was a Ruger SP101 so she now is the proud owner of one in .327 Federal Magnum with Hogue grips. The plan is to start her out with .32 Longs, then shoot some .32 H&R Magnum. If she is comfortable with those, then her home defense load will be six rounds of full power .327 Federal Magnum. The SP101 fits her hand well weighs in at 28 ozs (which she can handle well) so it will have a lot less recoil than some the very lightweight .38 Specials that gunshops seem to nearly always suggest to women. And she won't have to worry about mags, racking the slide, safeties, etc.davasmith wrote:Personally, my experience tells me to stick with revovler. My wife shoots and loves my s&w 38 spec. It's weight is negligable, is very easy aim (even in a point and shoot situation which most home defenses are going to be) and the cost of shooting it at the range will be light. The shotgun ideas are good for men who've been trained on them, I reckon a woman could use it as well. The length of pull, the length of the shotgun, the recoil, the sound and the time it takes to shoulder sight and squeeze would be my main concern in recommending it to anyone who has not had a lot of time working one. You can't go wrong with a revolver for home defense. She wont have to rack the gun, nor will she have to grab a shotgun and weild it. This is my personal experience, and advice. If your wife likes the color, that's cool too. The key is SHE MUST BE COMFORTABLE WITH, AND SHOOT WHAT SHE PLANS ON USING AS A DEFENSE WEAPON!
IMHO hope this helps.
With all that about her personal choice, I think that any woman wanting a HD gun should try out a variety of weapons. Some women are small, some larger, some sensitive to recoil, some not, some experienced shooters, some not - just like men they should choose what they think they can handle most effectively.
- Drewsifer
- Sharp Shooter

- Posts: 122
- Joined: Wed, 15 Sep 2010 21:00:08
- Location: Harrisonburg, Virginia
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Because shotguns were suggested. I didn't say we wouldn't consider other options, but we'll be looking at shotguns as well. I don't recall saying anything about death rays, or implying that being proficient with whatever weapon we get wouldn't be important. Could you go back and find where I said that please?Diomed wrote:Why the focus on shotguns? They're not some kind of magic death ray like Hollywood portrays. Effective use requires just as much practice as any other firearm, plus a healthy tolerance for recoil if you're using effective loads (buckshot and slugs in 12 or 20ga). Diminished magazine capacity is also a reality. Anything smaller/weaker, like the .410 or birdshot and it's just rolling the dice too much - stick with a carbine.Drewsifer wrote:I wouldn't be against her using a 20ga shotgun, but I'm worried that it's bit of a leap physcologically from pistols and .22's to a shotgun of any kind. But I'll brooch the subject.
Shotguns have several attractive features. Affordable, 20 ga recoil is very tolerable, good ammo selection, and very available in our area. I also don't recall saying we would be looking at shotguns exclusively and foregoing all other options. We'll look at carbines, but I think right now for her a Pistol Caliber Carbine would be the best option. Maybe later if she gets more into guns with me, and wants to move up, we'll look at a Carbine length AR.
Re: HD weapon for my wife
Hey, all I saw you mention in terms of long arms is shotguns. What I'm trying to say is don't fall into the trap of tunnel vision and trying to overlay your wants/desires/preferences/whatever you want to call them on to your wife. There was an analogy I read recently (wish I could remember where I saw it) that summed it up very well - it's like you deciding you have an interest in sewing and asking your wife to go pick you out a sewing machine for your use. Only your interest in sewing is in making heavyweight tactical gear, not frilly dresses like your wife makes. Her experience is with equipment geared towards the latter type of sewing, which is not going to mesh well with what you will use the machine for. The right frame of reference is vital to making the right decisions and not wasting time, money and effort.
I stand by my contention that a shotgun is a poor defensive choice for a novice or a recoil-sensitive shooter.
I stand by my contention that a shotgun is a poor defensive choice for a novice or a recoil-sensitive shooter.
