I'm a bad American

[OakRidgeStars]

I found this over at RightWingNews.com. I hope you like it, but it's OK if you don't.
Author unknown

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I'm a Bad American - this pretty much sums it up for me.

I like big trucks, big boats, big houses, and naturally, pretty women.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some midlevel governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies.

I don't care about appearing compassionate.

I think playing with toy guns doesn't make you a killer. I believe ignoring your kids and giving them Prozac might.

I think I'm doing better than the homeless.

I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized. I have the right not to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird or make me mad. This is my life to live, and not necessarily up to others expectations. I know what SEX is and there are not varying degrees of it.

I don't celebrate Kwanzaa. But if you want to that's fine; I just don't feel like everyone else should have to.

I believe that if you are selling me a Dairy Queen shake, a pack of cigarettes, or hotel room you do it in English. As of matter of fact, if you are an American citizen you should speak English. My uncles and forefathers shouldn't have had to die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come disrespect ours, and make us bend to your will. Get over it.

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry butt if you're running from them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word 'freeze' or 'stop' in English, see the previous line. I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions.

I know how to count votes and I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation do a recount when needed. I know what the definition of lying is, and it isn't based on the word "is"-ever.

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you qualify for any special loan programs, gov't sponsored bank loans, etc., so you can open a hotel, 7-Eleven, trinket shop, or any thing else, while the indigenous peoples can't get past a high school education because they can't afford it.

I didn't take the initiative in inventing the Internet. I thought the Taco Bell dog was funny.

I want them to bring back safe and sane fireworks.

I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or Marilyn Manson sang, but that doesn't mean I want to listen to that crap from someone else's car when I'm stopped at a red light. But I respect your right to.

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster or Jack In The Box.

I don't want to eat or drink anything with the words light, lite or fat-free on the package.

Our soldiers did not go to some foreign country and risk their lives in vain and defend our Constitution so that decades later you can tell me it's a living document ever changing and is open to interpretation. The guys who wrote it were light years ahead of anyone today, and they meant what they said - now leave the document alone, or there's going to be trouble.

I don't hate the rich. I help the poor. I know wrestling is fake. I've never owned, or was a slave, and a large percentage of our forefathers weren't wealthy enough to own one either. Please stop blaming me because some prior white people were idiots - and remember, tons of white, Indian, Chinese, and other races have been enslaved too - it was wrong for every one of them.

I believe a self-righteous liberal Democrat with a cause is more dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

I want to know exactly which church is it where the "Reverend" Jessie Jackson preaches; and, what exactly is his job function.

I own a gun, you can own a gun, and any red blooded American should be allowed to own a gun, but if you use it in a crime, then you will serve the time.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it makes you mad, then invent the next operating system that's better and put your name on the building. Ask your buddy that invented the Internet to help you.

I don't believe in hate crime legislation. Even suggesting it makes me mad. You're telling me that someone who is a minority, gay, disabled, another nationality, or otherwise different from the mainstream of this country has more value as a human being that I do as a white male. If someone kills anyone, I'd say that it's a hate crime. We don't need more laws! Let's enforce the ones we already have.

I think turkey bacon, turkey beef, turkey fake anything sucks. I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child-it takes a parent with the guts to stand up to the kid and spank his butt and say "NO!" when it's necessary to do so. I'll admit that the only movie that ever made me cry was Ole Yeller. I didn't realize Dr. Seuss was a genius until I had a kid.

I will not be frowned upon or be looked down upon or be made to keep silent because I have these beliefs and opinions. I thought this country allowed me that right. I will not conform or compromise just to keep from hurting somebody's feelings. I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise. Yes, I guess by some people's definition, I may be a bad American.

But that's tough.

[SHMIV]

Damn right.

I reckon I'm a bad American, too.

[Kreutz]

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry butt if you're running from them after they tell you to stop.

Who writes this crap? Some Turing tested right-wing AI?

[ShotgunBlast]

I didn't know Andy Rooney drove a pick up truck and chewed tobacco.

[ratherfish]

Not all of us carry to arm ourselves against the PD like you do Okreutz.

[ShotgunBlast]

What I don't understand is the purpose of this whole article. As a white male, I don't feel like I have to defend myself for what I do or don't do. I've never felt prompted to write something like this. Nothing about this person really makes them a bad American, but I guess when you post it on the website that it was it's good fodder to stir up the base.

I don't celebrate Kwanzaa. But if you want to that's fine; I just don't feel like everyone else should have to.

I don't either, but I also don't feel like I have to advertise that I don't. Is there some big Kwanzaa takeover that I'm not aware of?

I know how to count votes and I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation do a recount when needed. I know what the definition of lying is, and it isn't based on the word "is"-ever.

From a technical standpoint I would actually prefer a human counting votes. I've been following electronic voting machines for many years and I'm not thrilled with the manufacturers, their closed-sourced nature, or likelihood of being tampered with.

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you qualify for any special loan programs, gov't sponsored bank loans, etc., so you can open a hotel, 7-Eleven, trinket shop, or any thing else, while the indigenous peoples can't get past a high school education because they can't afford it.

Are they referring to Native Americans? Those are the only indigenous people I know of in this country.

And then there's the mindless drivel.

I didn't take the initiative in inventing the Internet. I thought the Taco Bell dog was funny.

I don't want to eat or drink anything with the words light, lite or fat-free on the package.

I think turkey bacon, turkey beef, turkey fake anything sucks.

It really makes the author come off as backwoods and simple-minded and I'm not sure if the right wants to give that kind of impression.

[ratherfish]

He's making fun of liberals.....


red neck satire evidently escapes you.

[FiremanBob]

There's nothing defensive about it. It has the same tone as this story:

A large-bellied member of the Lake Monticello Volunteer Fire Department was sitting, shirtless, in a Wal-Mart folding chair on the beach when a woman walked up to him and muttered, "Disgusting. If that belly were on a woman, I'd swear she was pregnant."

The firefighter just smiled and said, "It was, and she is."

[ShotgunBlast]

There's nothing defensive about it. It has the same tone as this story:

A large-bellied member of the Lake Monticello Volunteer Fire Department was sitting, shirtless, in a Wal-Mart folding chair on the beach when a woman walked up to him and muttered, "Disgusting. If that belly were on a woman, I'd swear she was pregnant."

The firefighter just smiled and said, "It was, and she is."

Now THAT got me laughing!

[dorminWS]

FiemanBob,

May I have your permission to use that one next time I go to the beach?

[steelheart]

yep im a bad american and damn proud of it!!

[BlackKnight]

Preaching to the chior. I'm with you.

[gunderwood]

From a technical standpoint I would actually prefer a human counting votes. I've been following electronic voting machines for many years and I'm not thrilled with the manufacturers, their closed-sourced nature, or likelihood of being tampered with.

You seem to be under the mistaken impression that elections weren't tampered with before technology. Consider technology just bringing efficiency to the process of buying elections.

[gunderwood]

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry butt if you're running from them after they tell you to stop.

Who writes this crap? Some Turing tested right-wing AI?

Yes, the authoritarians will love this!

Not all of us carry to arm ourselves against the PD like you do Okreutz.

Why bother with the running from police qualification, why not just shoot first? Speeding? BLAM! BLAM!

Problem solved.

[ShotgunBlast]

[Why bother with the running from police qualification, why not just shoot first? Speeding? BLAM! BLAM!

Problem solved.

That would definitely lower the recidivism rate. lol A win for America!!

[Kreutz]

Why bother with the running from police qualification, why not just shoot first? Speeding? BLAM! BLAM!

Problem solved.

Its just ironic, the article (if you can call it that) is chock full of USA USA USA, then says police should be able to gun anyone down at will; not exactly a sentiment I associate with a supposedly free society.

The rest of the stuff is recycled chain e-mail stuff, but that one stood out.

[ShotgunBlast]

Oh Kreutz. To quote your best friend:

He's making fun of liberals.....


red neck satire evidently escapes you.

[thekinetic]

I don't say I'm this or that but if you don't like me then stay the **** away from me. I don't pretend, I don't lie, I don't apologize, and I do hate half of the two legged vermin that meander this rock we call home. I don't trust churches, doctors, the government, or anyone my own age.

Does that make me a bad american or just sane?

Funny freggin read!

[Kreutz]

Oh Kreutz. To quote your best friend:

He's making fun of liberals.....


red neck satire evidently escapes you.

Can't see his posts, but I guess it does escape me.

I was always perplexed by the popularity of that you might be a redneck guy.

I'll just have to stick to what I know, New York jewish sarcasm and snark. Truth be told I didn't even know rednecks even have a sense of humor (like say, Germans) I suspected they may at least have the capacity for humor, but is this it?

[ShotgunBlast]

I guess some people don't mind having Larry the Cable Guy as a representative for their lifestyle.

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