A gunny vs. an officer

[VBshooter]

A young Marine officer was severely wounded in the head by a

grenade, but the only visible permanent injury was to both of his

ears, which were amputated. Since his hearing wasn't impaired he

remained in the Marine Corps. Many years later he eventually rose

to the rank of major general. He was, however, very sensitive

about his appearance.



One day the general was interviewing three Marines, prospects for

his headquarters staff.



The first was an aviator captain, and it was a great interview.

At the end of the interview the general asked him, "Do you notice

anything different about me?"



The young officer answered, "Why, yes, Sir, I couldn't help but

notice that you have no ears."



The general got very angry at his lack of tact and threw him out.



The second interview was with a logistics Lieutenant, and he was

even better. The general then asked him the same question, "Do

you notice anything different about me?"



He replied sheepishly, "Well, Sir, you have no ears."



The general, now really pissed, threw him out also.



The third interview was with a Marine gunnery sergeant, an

infantryman and Staff NCO. He was articulate, looked extremely

sharp and seemed to know more than the two officers combined.

The general wanted this guy, and went ahead with the same

question, "Do you notice anything different about me?"



To his surprise the sergeant said, "Yes, Sir, you wear contact

lenses."



The general was very impressed and thought, what an incredibly

observant NCO, and he didn't mention my ears. "And how do you

know that I wear contacts?" the General asked.



"Well, Sir," the gunny replied, "it's pretty hard to wear glasses

with no fxckin' ears."

[Jakeiscrazy]

[SgtBill]

And the Gunny got the job.
Semper Fi!
Bill

[zephyp]

Reminds me of the briefing I gave years ago around 1989 when we still used the plastic overlays. I was briefing a general from the field. "As you notice the red portion of the graph..." Little did I know he was color blind and too proud to admit it. Needless to say I got an ass chewing and all further briefings were in B&W. Turd...

[VBshooter]

Strange how that crap happens ain't it?? Being a mind reader is hell when its not in the manual.

[gunderwood]

Reminds me of the briefing I gave years ago around 1989 when we still used the plastic overlays. I was briefing a general from the field. "As you notice the red portion of the graph..." Little did I know he was color blind and too proud to admit it. Needless to say I got an ass chewing and all further briefings were in B&W. Turd...

If you ever want to know why the US military has problems, troops can't get equipment, decisions can't be made...work at the Pentagon for a day. No where else on earth is there as much concentrated ego and hubris.

[zephyp]

Reminds me of the briefing I gave years ago around 1989 when we still used the plastic overlays. I was briefing a general from the field. "As you notice the red portion of the graph..." Little did I know he was color blind and too proud to admit it. Needless to say I got an ass chewing and all further briefings were in B&W. Turd...

If you ever want to know why the US military has problems, troops can't get equipment, decisions can't be made...work at the Pentagon for a day. No where else on earth is there as much concentrated ego and hubris.

Yeah, right. I work there every day...it is quite full of egos, most bruised since all the chiefs gathered there are actually indians. You'll find most of the hubris right across the river unless it happens to drag its sorry self into the building.

[gunderwood]

Reminds me of the briefing I gave years ago around 1989 when we still used the plastic overlays. I was briefing a general from the field. "As you notice the red portion of the graph..." Little did I know he was color blind and too proud to admit it. Needless to say I got an ass chewing and all further briefings were in B&W. Turd...

If you ever want to know why the US military has problems, troops can't get equipment, decisions can't be made...work at the Pentagon for a day. No where else on earth is there as much concentrated ego and hubris.

Yeah, right. I work there every day...it is quite full of egos, most bruised since all the chiefs gathered there are actually indians. You'll find most of the hubris right across the river unless it happens to drag its sorry self into the building.

No, across the river is the loony bin.

[gunny5821]

Priceless!

[ricklee4570]

That was hilarious

[acguy45]

leave it to an NCO to tell it like it is. Someone has to.

[zephyp]

leave it to an NCO to tell it like it is. Someone has to.

One good thing I like about working for the Air Force...there is a minimum number of dumb officers and even fewer dumb NCOs...

[BW1911]

Stop me if you've heard (er... seen) this before...

Is sex work? A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish brewing, the colonel decided to pose a question to all assembled. He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep. He posed the question of just how much of sex was "work" and how much of it was "pleasure?"

A Major chimed in with 75-25% in favor of work. A Captain said it was 50-50%. A lieutenant responded with 25-75% in favor of pleasure, depending upon his state of inebriation at the time. There being no consensus, the colonel turned to the PFC who was in charge of making the coffee and asked for HIS opinion? Without any hesitation, the young PFC responded, "Sir, it has to be 100% pleasure."

The colonel was surprised and as you might guess, asked why?

"Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."

[VBshooter]

Out fu&^%in standing