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How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Tue, 24 Jan 2017 13:58:11
by jdr1337
Hi everyone, I this will be my first post on this forum and I am looking for some advice, hopefully this is the right section of the forum.

My youngest brother has fairly recently gotten into firearms with my stepfather. He is 16 and is on the autism spectrum, but mostly a normal kid. I went shooting with them and a friend and I had to correct his behavior multiple times, from things like leaving a loaded firearm on the line and walking away, or being cavalier with an unloaded firearm, gesturing with it and pointing it at himself and in directions other than downrange.

Most unsettling however, is that I have stopped by to visit on 2 occasions and found he had the keys to all of the guns, and access to ammunition. in both instances he had a handgun on his person or immediately accessible. This is something i know to be unsafe, illegal, and wrong. I raised the subject with my stepfather and he seemed to barely listen and sort of rush me off. I don't understand why he isnt taking my concerns to heart, maybe he thinks my brother is responsible enough to handle firearms unsupervised, but I know this to not be true based on his behavior at the range, and there is also the fact that this is against the law.

I don't want to go straight to "call the authorities", but if this doesn't change I fear that i will be obligated to as someone who has a strong dedication to firearms safety and responsible ownership. I would love to hear any suggestions or other opinions on this situation.

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Tue, 24 Jan 2017 21:14:05
by MarcSpaz
Pure opinion. Sounds like the parents need to work with him at home, at a significant level, before he goes back to the range or handles a loaded weapon.

Don't be afraid to say something to your family. Simply say "I'm telling this because I love you. I don't want to see any of you die due to a careless act... your son's behavior and handling of firearm is extremely dangerous. I would strongly recommend you work with him extensively at home before letting handle a live weapon again."

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sat, 28 Jan 2017 22:11:11
by Roverhound
Hmmm...

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 12:56:08
by jdr1337
Rover, not sure what you are getting at.

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 14:59:42
by ShotgunBlast
How old is your youngest brother?

What does your mother think about all this?

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 17:14:48
by jdr1337
My mom hated guns and passed away about 2 years ago. My brother is 18, but he's mildly autistic and doesn't act like an 18 year old.

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 17:15:23
by jdr1337
I mistyped 16 in OP, sorry.

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 18:06:04
by ShotgunBlast
I agree with Marc. Have a conversation with the stepfather. It might be the only option you have.

If he's 18 though I'm not sure what illegal acts you think he's doing.

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 18:07:33
by jdr1337
At 18 in MD you cannot have handguns. It seems highly questionable to me.

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Sun, 29 Jan 2017 20:57:22
by SHMIV
Ahh... Maryland. Maryland law is different from Virginia law.

Maybe you could take a safety class with your brother? It sounds like your stepfather, unfortunately, has some bad habits that are being reflected in your brother.

It seems doubtful that you'd be able to cure your stepfathers bad habits, especially since he doesn't seem to recognize them, but you may be able to work them out of your brother.

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 09:47:30
by Roverhound
jdr1337 wrote:Rover, not sure what you are getting at.

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One post, checked it about an hour later, then nothing for 4 days. Thought we might have had another drive by but it looks like the op has come back.
Maybe I'm paranoid but I believe we have people that join gun forums phishing for negative comments to use in their, "See! I told you they were all cretins!" pages.

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 10:15:24
by dorminWS
If your stepfather and brother are using a real range with a competent range officer, you might want to have a word with him (or the owner of the range) about your concerns. That way the message would be reinforced from a third party and perhaps the bad habits would be curbed to preserve range privileges.

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 10:40:56
by Reverenddel
Roverhound wrote:
jdr1337 wrote:Rover, not sure what you are getting at.

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One post, checked it about an hour later, then nothing for 4 days. Thought we might have had another drive by but it looks like the op has come back.
Maybe I'm paranoid but I believe we have people that join gun forums phishing for negative comments to use in their, "See! I told you they were all cretins!" pages.



It's terrible we have to be that way, but it's true.

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 13:01:45
by SpanishInquisition
Maybe there's a Maryland gun owners forum that can provide information more salient to that state...

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Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 15:26:57
by jdonovan
md has one of their own, https://www.mdshooters.com/forum.php

good bunch over there, and a fairly active forum too.

Re: How to handle unsafe behavior in relatives

PostPosted: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 21:18:32
by jdr1337
Thanks for all your input guys, I'll try talking to him again. They shoot at a recreational club where there is never really a range officer present.

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