Laws not taught in Physics...

[dorminWS]

Laws not taught in Physics...

1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with
grease, your nose will begin to itch..



2.Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll
to the least accessible place in the universe.




3.Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.




4.Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a
busy signal; someone always answers.



5.Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you
were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.



6.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the
telephone will ring.



7.Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you
know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want
to be seen with.




8.Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine
won't work, IT WILL!!!



9.Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely
proportional to the reach.



10.Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose
seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the
ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or
the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or
the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move
once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end
of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.




11.The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the
coffee is cold.



12.Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker
room, they will have adjacent lockers.




13.Law of Physical Surfaces -
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a
floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or
rug.



14.Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know
what you are talking about.



15. Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.



16.Law of Public Speaking -- A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!



17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a
product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store
will stop selling it!



18.Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to
the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't
make an appointment and you'll stay sick.




If you don't forward this to your friends, your belly button will
unscrew. Really... It's true. I read it on the Internet!

[Hammer]

Buttons don't screw.

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

[dorminWS]

Buttons don't screw.

[ Post made via Mobile Device ]

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

uh-huh. And your bellybutton ain't a button, either.

[Greybeard]

19. Law of Profound Embarrassment - Watching your boss do something that you told him couldn't be done.

[smltooner]

#17 always seems to happen at the grocery store.