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A Place To Tell Jokes

General discussion - Feel free to discuss anything you want here. Firearm related is preferred, but not required

A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby OakRidgeStars » Wed, 29 Apr 2009 20:20:07

Let's hear what you've got :hysterical:

------------------------------------------------

A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened.

Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00.

When the postal authorities received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the President.

The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the $5 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read:

Dear God,
Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Washington D.C. and those a$$holes took $95 in taxes.
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby SnakeEater » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:10:07

:hysterical: That is so true hahahahahaha How bout this one

Chili Cook-off Judge

Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all tha t spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted."

Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI ...

Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Niice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 -- (Frank) -- Holy ****, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN'S AFTERBURNER CHILI ...

Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.
Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignit e. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting ****-faced from all of the beer.

CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC...

Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb. woman is starting to look HOT ...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

CHILI # 5 LISA'S LEG AL LIP REMOVER...

Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics.
The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks.

CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY...

Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I **** on myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my A## with a snow cone.

CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. (At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing. it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.)

CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too hot, not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existtence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor feller, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?
Judge # 3 -- No Report
Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both. Benjamin Franklin

For Those Who FOUGHT For It FREEDOM Has a Flavor the Protected WILL NEVER KNOW.

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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby SnakeEater » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:13:15

Here is a nice little Virginia joke or there bouts enjoy :roll:

al-Zarqawi at the pearly gates

When Abu al-Zarqawi died, he was met by George Washington as he tried to approach the Pearly Gates. Washington slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive?"



Patrick Henry then stood before him, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed!"

James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "This is why I allowed our government to provide for the common defense!"

Thomas Jefferson was next, beating al-Zarqawi with a long cane and snarling "It was evil men like you who inspired me to write the Declaration of Independence."

The beatings and thrashings continued as George Mason, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans unleashed their anger on the terrorist leader.

As al-Zarqawi lay bleeding and in terrible pain, the Prophet Mohammad appeared. Al-Zarqawi fell at his feet weeping and said, "This is not what you promised me!"


Mohammad replied, "My son, it is exactly what I promised. I clearly said that for those who murder innocents in the name of Allah, there would be 72 Virginians waiting for them in the after-life. What did you think I said?"
Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both. Benjamin Franklin

For Those Who FOUGHT For It FREEDOM Has a Flavor the Protected WILL NEVER KNOW.

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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby SnakeEater » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:15:41

Let's go for the trifecta

Stop the Violence
Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London. One took a window seat and
the other sat next to him in the middle seat.
Just before takeoff, a Marine sat down in the aisle seat.
After takeoff, the Marine kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and
was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said, "I need to get
up and get a coke."
"Don't get up," said the Marine, "I'm in the aisle seat, I'll get it
for you."
As soon as he left, one of the Arabs picked up the Marines shoe and
spat in it.
When the Marine returned with the coke, the other Arab said, "That
looks good, I'd really like one, too."
Again, the Marine obligingly went to fetch it.
While he was gone the other Arab picked up the Marines other shoe and
spat in it.
When the Marine returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight. As
the plane was landing, the Marine slipped his feet into his shoes and
knew immediately what had happened.
The marine says "Why does it have to be this way?" "How long must this
go on? This fighting between our nations? This hatred? This animosity?
This spitting in shoes...... and peeing in cokes?"



THE MARINES WILL ALWAYS WIN!
Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both. Benjamin Franklin

For Those Who FOUGHT For It FREEDOM Has a Flavor the Protected WILL NEVER KNOW.

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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby SnakeEater » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 01:55:29

Found this on XDTalk and thought you would enjoy as stated there I dare you to read this with out crying it is so funny :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:

Just got this in my email... Real or not this is fricken funny!!!

Pocket Tazer Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Tazer for their anniversary submitted this:

Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse- sized tazer. The effects of the tazer were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety....?? WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs. AWESOME!!!
Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-A batteries, right? There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and tazer in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries.

All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference; pretty cute really and (loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-A batteries) thinking to myself, 'no possible way!' What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best.. ..? I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, 'don't do it dip****,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad. I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and . .
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . . WHAT THE HELL!!!
I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs? The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a tazer, one note of caution: there is no such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor.. A three second burst would be considered conservative? IT HURT LIKE HELL!!! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was. My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. I had no control over the drooling. Apparently I pooped on myself, but was too numb to know for sure and my sense of smell was gone. I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head which I believe came from my hair. I'm still looking for my nuts and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return!

P.S... My wife, can't stop laughing about my experience, loved the gift, and now regularly threatens me with it!

If you think education is difficult, try being stupid !!!
Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both. Benjamin Franklin

For Those Who FOUGHT For It FREEDOM Has a Flavor the Protected WILL NEVER KNOW.

SEMPER FI!!


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby OakRidgeStars » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 07:47:05

''Hello?"

"Hi honey, this is Daddy, Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No Daddy, She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank."

After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Frank."

"Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now."

Brief Pause

"Uh, okay then, ...this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to Mommy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway."

"Okay Daddy, just a minute."

A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone. "I did it Daddy."

"And what happened honey?" he asked.

"Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn't moving at all!"

"Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Frank?"

"He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead"

***Long Pause***

***Longer Pause***

Then Daddy says, "Swimming pool??...Is this 555-7039??"
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby allingeneral » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 08:38:31

LOL you guys are cracking me up! :hysterical: :clap:
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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby Hiwaytahell » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 18:18:39

:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:
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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby Vahunter » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 19:30:44

Playboy offered Sarah Palin 1 million dollars to pose nude for their centerfold. Now National Geographic has offered the same $$$ to Michelle Obama. :hysterical:


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby allingeneral » Thu, 30 Apr 2009 20:48:27

Vahunter wrote:Playboy offered Sarah Palin 1 million dollars to pose nude for their centerfold. Now National Geographic has offered the same $$$ to Michelle Obama. :hysterical:


OUCH!! LOL :hysterical:
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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby skt239 » Fri, 01 May 2009 01:18:21

A penguin is on his way to work when smoke starts billowing out from under his hood. The penguin spots a service station to pulls in. He leaves his car with the mechanic and heads across the street to a corner store for a cold drink and an ice cream cone.

After a while, he returns to the service station where the mechanic is waiting with a diagnosis. "It looks like you blew a seal" the mechanic says to the penguin. "Oh this?" the penguin says wiping his mouth, "no, I was just eating some vanilla ice cream".


:hysterical:


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby SnakeEater » Fri, 01 May 2009 03:46:27

Now that is just wrong!!!! :clap: :hysterical: :clap: :hysterical: :clap:


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby OakRidgeStars » Fri, 01 May 2009 08:09:30

A Catholic priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while the priest turns to the rabbi and asks, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?"

The rabbi responds, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."

The priest then asks, "Have you ever eaten pork?"

The rabbi replies, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation and tasted a ham sandwich."

The priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading.

A while later, the rabbi spoke up and asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?"

The priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith."

The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?"

The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke with my faith."

The rabbi nodded understandingly. He was silent for about five minutes, and then the rabbi said, "Beats a ham sandwich, doesn't it?"
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby Vahunter » Fri, 01 May 2009 19:42:00

Subject: DOD Briefing


The Dept Of Defense briefed the President this morning.

They told President Obama that 2 Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq.

To everyone's surprise, all the color drained from Obama's face.

Then he collapsed onto his desk, head in his hands, visibly shaken, almost in tears. Finally, he composed himself and asked, "Just how many is a brazilian?"

This is not surprising, since he obviously has no understanding of billion or trillion either :hysterical:


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby Vahunter » Fri, 01 May 2009 19:46:18

Those Church Hymns
A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning.


He said 'Today, in church, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach




Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn that comes to your mind.'
The pastor shouted out 'CROSS.'

Immediately the congregation started singing in unison, 'THE OLD RUGGED CROSS..'

The pastor hollered out 'GRACE.' The congregation began to sing 'AMAZING GRACE,?how sweet the sound.'

The pastor said 'POWER.' The congregation sang 'THERE IS POWER IN THE BLOOD.'

The Pastor said 'SEX' The congregation fell into total silence.

Everyone was in shock. They all nervously began to look around at each other afraid to say anything.

Then all of a sudden, way from in the back of the church,
A little old 87 year old grandmother stood up and began to sing 'PRECIOUS MEMORIES.'


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby Vahunter » Fri, 01 May 2009 19:47:40

Polish Sausage

Everyone is in a hurry to scream 'racism' these days!

'In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?'
The clerk looks at him and says, 'Are you Polish?'

The guy (clearly offended) says, 'Well, yes I am.

But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog, would you ask me if I was Jewish?

Or if I had asked for a taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?'

'If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?'

The clerk says, 'Well, no, I probably wouldn't!'

With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says,
'Well then, why did you ask me if I'm Polish because I asked for Polish sausage?'

The clerk replied, 'Because you're in Home Depot' :hysterical: :hysterical:


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby flowmaster » Fri, 01 May 2009 22:12:23

i've got some pretty terrible blind jokes.

how did helen keller meet her husband? blind date.
have you ever seen a picture of helen keller's father? neither has she.
did you know that helen keller had a swing set in her back yard? neither did she.
how did helen keller's teachers get her to shut up during class? mittens.
want to hear about a dangerous reading accident? the time she tried to read the waffle iron.

ok, here's another one. do you like cyder? ever had a dicken's? you know, dicken's-cyder?

i've got some woman jokes, but those are not really proper to be telling.
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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby OakRidgeStars » Sat, 02 May 2009 17:36:43

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in
despair, he has his first meeting with the devil...

Satan: "Why so glum?"

Guy: "What do you think? I'm in hell!"

Satan: "Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You
a drinking man?"

Guy: "Sure, I love to drink."

Satan: "Well, you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, that's all we
do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, Tab, and Fresca.
We drink 'til we throw up, and then we drink some more! And you don't
have to worry about getting a hangover, because you're dead anyway."

Guy: "Gee that sounds great!"

Satan: "You a smoker?"

Guy: "You better believe it!"

Satan: "All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars
from all over the world, and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no
biggie, you're already dead, remember?"

Guy: "Wow...that's awesome!"

Satan: "I bet you like to gamble."

Guy: "Why, yes, as a matter of fact I do."

Satan: "Good, 'cause Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps,
blackjack, roulette, poker, slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt, it
doesn't matter, you're dead anyhow."

Guy: "Cool!"

Satan: "What about Drugs?"

Guy: "Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...?"

Satan: "That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great
big bowl of crack or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You
can do all the drugs you want. You're dead so who cares."

Guy: "Wow! I never realized Hell was such a cool place!"

Satan: "You gay?"

Guy: "No..."

Satan: "Ooooh, you're gonna hate Fridays ..."
"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin


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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby Riana » Sun, 03 May 2009 15:05:03

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, Harry, what's your problem?"

Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"

Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.

The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test. Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"

Harry: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"

Harry: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her,"I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade."

Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."

The principal and Harry both agreed. Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"

Harry, after a moment: "Legs."

Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered, why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: "Pockets."

Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"

Harry: "Pants"

Ms. Brooks: What's starts with a C, ends with! a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?

Harry: "Coconut."

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open. Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"

The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer.

Harry: "Bubble gum"

Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?" Harry: "Shake hands." The principal was trembling.

Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?"

Harry: "Firetruck"

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong......"
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Re: A Place To Tell Jokes

Postby OakRidgeStars » Mon, 04 May 2009 08:23:18

Deer Camp

The guys were all at deer camp. They had to bunk two to a room.

No one wanted to room with Daryl because he snored so badly.

They decided it wasn't fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time
so they voted to take turns.

The first guy slept with Daryl and comes to breakfast the next morning with
his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot.

They said, "Man, what happened to you?"
He said, "Daryl snored so loud, I just sat up and watched him all night."

The next night it was a different guy's turn. In the morning, same
thing--hair all standing up, eyes all blood-shot.
They said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful!"
He said, "Man, that Daryl shakes the roof. I watched him all night."

The third night was Frank's turn.

Frank was a big burly ex-football player; a man's man.

The next morning he came to breakfast bright eyed and bushy tailed.

"Good morning," he said. They couldn't believe it!

They said, "Man, what happened?"

He said, "Well, we got ready for bed. I went over and tucked Daryl into bed
and kissed him good night on the forehead.

He sat up and watched me all night long."
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